Communication is the key to having a strong relationship. You can tell when someone has a healthy relationship by the way that they communicate. People can be taught to communicate and most of the time they have bad habits in communication because they have never learned how to have healthy talking.
Communication is something that allows you to share your ideas and your feelings by talking but it also involves being a good listener. Communication is about expressing what you’re feeling in a healthy way and by letting your partner do the same things. You need to be just as good as a listener as a talker.
Here are ways you can make your relationship better!
- Ask Questions
Talking doesn’t mean that you should just ask how someone’s day is. You should be able to get to know the person that you’re talking to in a deep way. You can talk about things such as your feelings and you can dig deeper by practicing and working on this, especially if you aren’t comfortable with it.
Without pressuring someone, you can get them to go deep with what they talk to you about. Ask questions that are open ended and not yes or no questions. Say things like, “how was your day today?” If they choose to just say, “good,” then you can be patient about this and let it go or you can go deeper by asking, “what did you do?” or other questions that will get them to open up.
Be patient with your partner if they don’t talk to you deeply. Sometimes people will close off their heart and emotions and it takes them time to get past those boundaries. Always be respectful of these things. As you get to know them, you will need to be honest with each other and this brings trust.
- Notice Nonverbal Cues
Your partner might talk to you and say one thing, but their body might say something else. Notice their nonverbal cues when they answer you. If they aren’t ready to really communicate with you then let them have time.
The way that you talk and the tone that you set will tell more to someone than what you say. Be able to pick up on the nonverbal cues that your partner is giving you such as how they are standing, where their hands are, if they are expressive, looking in your eyes and more.
- You Don’t Really Know
Even if you think that your partner is thinking or saying something, you don’t really know. Ask them. Don’t try to read their mind. If you don’t know what your partner is feeling or thinking, ask them questions and tell them that you need them to open up.
On the flip side, you can’t expect your partner to read your mind either. If something is wrong, tell your partner. Don’t ignore the problem but be open to telling them what is going on. It isn’t going to be healthy for you to get mad at your partner for not knowing what you’re feeling, especially if you refuse to say.
If your partner is a person that has passive aggressive qualities, you need to make sure that you are being honest with how you feel and ask them to be honest with what they are feeling. Be patient with them and know that everyone misses cues sometimes.
- Conversation Goes Both Ways
You shouldn’t be the only one in the relationship having a conversation. You need to make sure that the conversation is going both ways. Talk to your partner and ask questions about what they are feeling and thinking. Find out what they are saying or meaning and don’t point blame at them.
Remember, both of you are in a relationship and you need to both feel that you are being heard. If you feel that your partner is the only one that is saying what they feel, make this part of the conversation. They might not realize that you’re feeling this way.
- Talk to Them
Talk to your partner and learn to communicate openly and honestly. Even if you don’t feel comfortable with this at first as you talk to each other you will get better at it. You might argue a lot but as you do, you will see that you can learn a new way of communicating. You will have to talk about things that matter such as finances and other things and since these things have to be talked about you need to be able to communicate.
You can learn that arguing isn’t going to get you anywhere and you need to set aside time to talk and to speak your mind, but you also need to make sure that you are being respectable and that you are being respected.
Try to talk for an hour so that you can get through the conversation. Learn to bond and to love each other more as you learn to talk with each other and get deeper.
- Say What You Want and Need
Sometimes your partner might not know what you want or need because you don’t tell them. Then you get mad at them for not giving you these things. If you don’t tell them what you want, you might not be able to get the support that you want.
Talk to your partner about these things and allow them to have a chance to do the right thing for you.
- Using Talking as a Skill
Talking is actually a skill and it is something that you can learn to do. Make sure that you are healthy when you talk to your partner and that you are being kind and respectful. Make an effort to be more open and to be able to open the line of communication with each other.
