How to Deal With a Break Up and Heal a Broken Heart

“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.” ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

Dealing with a break up is no joke.  When your relationship falls apart and you find yourself missing the one you love, the pain is indescribable. It gnaws at you all day and then eats away at you even more viciously during the night. You yearn for his or her touch, waiting on the phone to ring, wondering if they miss you the same.  Clearly, there is no pain like that of a broken heart.

So, what is the best way to deal with a break up.  What should you do when your ex says good bye? Should you give up? Should you try to forget, drink yourself into oblivion, or maybe even become a stalker?

The answer is not the same for every situation, but you should really avoid doing anything hasty. That includes, not being too quick to decide whether you can’t or can save your relationship.

Before you give up all hope, act out irrationally, or pick up the phone to pour out your heart- do yourself a big favor: Look within to see what wounds need to be healed.

Chances are, you aren’t just hurting because of this break up. The current disappointment likely hurts so bad because it brings up painful memories and feelings from your past. A broken relationship may trigger feelings of abandonment and loss that you thought were resolved long ago.

No matter how strong you are, it is devastating to experience the compounded heartache that exists when a fresh break up adds to the unhealed wounds of yesteryear.  Doesn’t that make you realize how important it is to fully deal with your problems when they happen.  Why bring baggage from past relationships, or even baggage from childhood, into present relationships? If you want to prevent a future break up instead of repeatedly dealing with break ups, it’s time to stop the ugly cycle.

Instead of focusing on the current break up with your ex back, focus on how to feel better about yourself. Focus on healing your broken heart, not just from this heartache, but from all unresolved pain. Be gentle with yourself. Love yourself and see the best in you.  Then and only then will you attract relationships that reflect the love that you deserve.

Looking for a quick fix?  This site offers plenty of tips to help with the current pain, but I also want you to concentrate on long term solutions.

Once you deal with your own baggage, you’ll be better prepared to decide if what you really want is to get back with your ex.  Moreover, your ex is likely to be more receptive to getting back together after seeing the positive changes you’ve made.

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